Twas The Week After Christmas - Happy New Year!

Twas the week after Christmas 
and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, 
not even a blouse.

The cookies I'd nibbled, 
the eggnog I'd taste.
All the holiday parties 
had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales 
there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store 
(less a walk than a lumber).

I'd remember the marvelous 
meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces 
and beef nicely rared,

The wine and the rum balls, 
the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, 
"No thank you, please."

So--away with the last 
of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruitcake, 
every cracker and chip

Every last bit of food 
that I like must be banished
Till all the additional 
ounces have vanished.

I won't have a cookie-- 
not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew 
on a long celery stick.

I won't have hot biscuits, 
or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot 
and quietly cry.

I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, 
and life is a bore --
But isn't that what 
January is for?

Unable to giggle, 
no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all 
and to all a good diet!

 

http://llerrah.com/twastheweekafterchristmas.htm

 

 



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